Write a short story that uses these four elements as the basic plot line: a prohibition, rule, or commandment from an authority figure,
Exercise B: The Prohibition
Consider stories such as Peter Rabbit and the Genesis garden story: in both, the authority figure tells the protagonist what not to do. In each story, the protagonist violates the prohibition, which leads to two levels of consequence: personal consequences, and consequences with the prohibitor.
Write a short story that uses these four elements as the basic plot line:
- a prohibition, rule, or commandment from an authority figure
- doing the prohibited
- personal short-term consequences for the protagonist
- long-term, authority consequences
Note that the first and final elements have to do with the prohibitor or authority, while the middle two have to do with the protagonist (who is “doing the don’t”). It is recommended that you give yourself 15 minutes to complete this writing exercise.
(Adapted from What If? Writing Exercises for Fiction Writers)
Student example:
This well-dressed boy in my class was quiet, observant, and kind, as far as I could tell. But the teacher told us not to mess with him, that he was special. I didn’t like that word.
One sticky summer day, I was stuck in detention. I rapped my fingers against the top of my heavy math book. The classroom door opened slowly. The sleepy-faced teacher pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose with one finger and looked to the person entering. It was the well-dressed boy. His books were folded closely to his chest. The teacher looked puzzled; everyone else in the room felt that he had entered the wrong room. He walked down the aisle of desks, past sleeping students and graffiti-covered desks, and rested his books softly on the desk next to mine. I was irritated that he chose to sit so close. Because we were in the same homeroom, he probably figured that I would be less likely to bully him. I turned to look at him, but his eyes were already on me. Cold, dark, beady eyes.
“What the hell are you looking at?” I asked.
He stayed silent, though his left eye winced slightly at my hostility. I felt the need to go further, seeing him falter.
“Stop staring, freak. Didn’t anyone tell you it’s rude to stare?” Again, he said nothing.
I stood up, my desk screeching, and towered above him. I balled my fist and clenched it tightly, hoping to scare him, but he showed no fear.
The teacher finally startled when he heard the striking of flesh on flesh. He yelled to me. I flinched at the sudden booming voice. The teacher grabbed my collar and pulled me away, calling campus security as he did. I looked over my shoulder at the wounded, well-dressed boy, and he smiled.
Part 2: Peer Response
You are responsible for responding to at least one of your peers’ writing exercises.
Respond to your peer’s posts by answering both of the questions below. (Please respond to work in the order it is posted, i.e., respond to the earliest posted exercise that has yet to receive a response.)
- What intrigues me most is _________________. (This should be something that has captivated you and/or something you’d like to know more about.)
- Have you considered _________________? (This should be some sort of idea or suggestion/direction for the author.)
here are two short story for part two
A :
“Haven’t I told you to be a good girl? Is being a good girl that difficult?”
Those cold eyes stared right towards me like a murderer. Am I going to die?
It was a random night of Nov. 24th, the day I swore to myself I was going to remember for the rest of my life. Everything seemed quite normal on that day, other than the fact that I saw a bird flying and smashing its head on the tree and died instantly right in front of my house. Is something bad going to happen to me? Shit, I don’t want to jinx it!
KNOCK KNOCK
My housekeeper went to open the door and welcomed one girl in. She was around 5’8’’ tall with a long brunette hair. With an oblong face shape and a slim body figure, why does she remind me of Keanu Reeves but in a girl version?
“Hi! I’m Amanda, Ethan’s helper. I’m here to see your father, Mr. Channing?” The girl whose I have just learnt her name was Amanda asked.
“Hi Amanda, you’re finally here! Welcome and let’s go have a seat in the living room and have a nice talk about…”
“No thanks sir!” Amanda interrupted my dad. “I’m here to speak to you for only a few seconds… about how terrible your daughter is.”
“Larly?” My dad suddenly became stunned as if someone has dreadfully stabbed a knife right into his chest. “What has Larly done to you?”
“She slept with my dad knowing that he was already married and had children!”
BANG!
That explosion of truth shattered extremely loudly but silently in my head. That moment became awkward for us all. The time, then, moved very slowly, even slower than a speed of a broken legged sloth trying to climb up a tree during the winter. My body froze just like a mummy. I could feel my legs breaking as they were starting to lose their balances. I decided to pull my conscious back and yelled,
“You’re lying! Ethan only has two kids and they are only three years old! Plus, you’re only his helper. What the hell are you talking about?”
“I can see how stupid you are now that you even believed my dad was going to get a divorce just to be you earlier. I’m not his helper or whatever this bullshit job is all about at your dad’s company! I’m his daughter from his first wife! Your perfect Mr. Ethan has probably never told you about his actual first wife right? Doesn’t my face remind you anything of him?” Amanda asked while shouting.
Keanu Reeves… that’s right…
As I was about to yell back and asked all the speculating questions that I had in my head,
BAM!
My dad slapped me right on the face in front of Amanda.
“Haven’t I told you to be a good girl? Is being a good girl that difficult?” He asked.
B :
“Why should I apologize? What did I do wrong? “
Peng！ A bright red liquid appeared on the ground.
At the graduation party, the teacher suggested that everyone talk about their dreams.
I look at everyone very excited, perhaps this is the child, always full of hope.
“I want to be a scientist so that I can benefit mankind.” The boy said triumphantly.
“Good. I knew Yifei was a child with a great dream. When you become a famous scientist, remember to tell everyone that I am your high school teacher. ” The teacher said while laughing.
“I want to be a psychologist and help people solve their psychological problems.” A girl said shyly.
“That sounds great.” The teacher said excitedly.
“I want to be a soldier.” ; “I want to be a mathematician.” I want to be a star.”
The students said their ideals excitedly.
“I’m very honored to have your ideal children as my students. I hope you guys can come back to visit your teachers when you become elite.” The teacher’s voice was as excited as if he had won a five million lottery.
The teacher picked up the glass, although because of the age of the students, the glass is full of coke, but the teacher seems to have been drinking champagne with a group of social elites.
“I want to be a farmer…” then a small voice came out of the corner.
The voice was very weak, but everyone heard it. Everyone stopped talking and looked at the corner.
“What did you say? You mean you’re going to be an agricultural scientist? That’s good too. I’m proud of you. ” Teacher some doubts, but also some happy said.
“No, I want to be a farmer, not an agricultural scientist.” This time the voice firmed up a lot, but also increased the volume.
“He’s really fit to be a farmer. His parents are farmers.” A classmate said.
Suddenly, the party was like seeing a clown, and everyone was laughing wildly.
“My parents are farmers, but they are very hardworking. I hope to help them grow more cabbages so that they can relax.” The sound came from that corner again.
This time I saw clearly that it was the classmate who was always ignored by people. His name was Tianming. He was a farmer’s child. His family was not rich, so he was always ignored by his classmates.
“Apologies to everyone. This is not a dream. You should be an agricultural scientist.” There was some anger in the teacher’s voice.
“Do I have to apologize because I don’t want to be rich? Why? Because I don’t have enough money? What’s the matter with the farmers? Aren’t all the food you eat grown by the farmers? ” Tianming wronged said, no one noticed his eyes were in tears.
“Forget it, today is the graduation party. It’s such a happy day. Let’s ignore the farmer who has no dream. “A classmate said with a sarcastic tone.
For a moment, the whole Party laughed even more, as if tomorrow was the day to play the clown.
I didn’t know what to say. At this time, I saw the teacher come to the front of Tianming.
“Go and say sorry to your classmates, just say that you were wrong just now. They really want to be friends with you. I know you must want to be an agricultural scientist, right? “The teacher said awkwardly, with a reluctant smile.
Tianming slowly looked up at the teacher, and lowered his head. He didn’t say sorry. The teacher turned back to the students to discuss the ideal of the future.
After a while, the window opened, a gust of wind blowing, red liquid appeared on the ground.
That night, the siren, the sound of the ambulance and the laughter of the students were interspersed together, like the whispers of the devil.
Answer preview for Write a short story that uses these four elements as the basic plot line: a prohibition, rule, or commandment from an authority figure,
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